Is control affecting your relationship?
Dynamics of control in relationships We can all be controlling at certain times and perhaps most of us can relate to a need for control to feel in control of our lives. In relationships, there are many moments that will come up to show us we have no control. People will invariably do things we […]
Relationship Conflict that turns into arguing.
What is behind arguing? If you seem to try and solve your conflict by arguing you may be trying to be right as a way of solving the dispute or differences. When we become focused on a right and a wrong, trying to prove something or make the other person’s opinion or desires wrong can […]
Emotional Reactivity – Learn this practice to change it.
Emotional reactivity – What is happening? Communication is greatly affected when we are emotionally reactive – when our nervous system is activated. In this video, I talk about what is happening and how that leads to overtaking our emotions, thoughts and behaviour. How to distinguish between what you are experiencing with your partner and what […]
Understanding Parts Work
Understanding Parts Work Here is a clear description of parts work from an Internal Family Systems perspective. Parts are described as relating to the schemas we develop throughout our lives based on our experiences in life. These are outdated ideas about how we need to live our lives because they are based on the past. […]
Relationship strategies that get you nowhere.
Negotiating what you want in relationships is an essential skill. In This post we discuss the common strategies that lead to disconnection.
10 Ways to Let Go of Mistrust
Developing trust in relationships is essential to feeling content and secure in our life. In this post we examine how you can do this.
Do you struggle with wanting to feel normal?
Struggles to Feel Normal. I am not sure I have ever said ‘I want to feel normal.’ I think I have been one of those people at the other end of the spectrum who has made a point of being different and expressed my independence at every opportunity. Being unique and authentic has been a […]
Dare to Be You !
The Road To Self Acceptance Is your self acceptance affected by trying to do the right thing, not making waves, and being careful not to upset people? Do you find that living this way leaves you feeling disconnected, and you don’t feel real? You are not alone. Self-acceptance can be a double-edged sword. You […]
Thoughts on unhappiness and depression.
The causes of depression are complicated and is a part of the human experience for most people at some point. These thoughts are attempting to look at it in the broader context.
Integration is the main task of therapy
Emotions are crucial to our integration and healing . Here’s why.