Couples Counselling for your Relationship

Accepting New Clients

Is Your Relationship in Trouble?

Relationship Counselling Can Help

Partners are often afraid that the counsellor will take sides, and the conflict happening in your relationship will escalate in couples counselling.  Or you may be worried that your partner may talk about things you are not ready for.

At Turning Point we are here to support both of you so that you talk honestly and get to those things that are meaningful between you.

Couples report that in couples therapy they have been able to talk more intimately,  and feel safer discussing difficult topics, and they have changed destructive patterns.

Our counsellors can provide clear, experienced guidance to help you create a loving, fun, and intimate partnership.

At Turning Point we are guided by and trained in a number of therapy approaches and we continue to stay updated on research about what works in our relationships today.   These include;

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Relationship Challenges We Have Helped Overcome

Constant arguing and hurtful exchanges that are hard to control
You don’t seem to make progress because the same issues keep coming up
You are communicating in ways that make it harder to understand each other
You have lost your closeness and connection
There is a loss of trust because of betrayal
Discussions escalate into proving who is right or wrong
There is a lack of intimacy and sex life
You have been thinking about ending the relationship or fear your partner will leave
Boundaries with extended family
Avoidance of conflict

    We Welcome Partners Who Identify As

    Lesbian, gay, bi-, queer, and questioning
    Cis, non-binary, trans-gendered, or gender nonconforming
    Polyamorous, consensual-non monogamy, kink

    Two Introductions to Relationship Work

    open relationships

    Workshops on How to Reduce Reactivity
    in Your Relationships

    Workshop Information

    Meet Turning Point Therapy's Couples Counsellors

    Picture of Delyse Ledgard clinical director of Turning Point Therapy.

    Registered Clinical Counsellor

    Certified RLT Practitioner
    Developmental Couples Counselling Level 1 & 2

    Read Delyse's Bio

    Tamsen Simon

    Reduced fee.
    Completed Level 1 RLT (enrolled in Certification)

    Read Tamsen's Bio
    couples counsellor

    Alisa Chirpicinic

    Registered Clinical Counsellor
    Completed Level 1 RLT
    Gottman Workshop.

    Read Alisa's Bio
    couples counsellor

    Jodie Read

    Registered Clinical Counsellor
    Completed Level 1 & 2 RLT

    Read Jodie's Bio

    Michelle Carchrae

    Registered Clinical Counsellor
    Level 1 RLT

    Read Michelle's Bio
    aron counsellor

    Aron Buky-Tompa

    Registered Clinical Counsellor
    Level 1 RLT
    Non-Violent Communication

    Read Aron's Bio

      Ways That Couple's Counselling is Ineffective

      Not Giving it Time

      Change is hard for you and your partner. Change occurs in small increments. Understanding that you both have difficult habits to change will go a long way. It takes effort to stay conscious and improve your reactions to each other. In other words, a couple of sessions are unlikely going to make long-lasting changes.

      Only Focusing on your partner as the problem

      When we are in conflict we respond from the fight or flight part of our nervous system. So we can approach couples therapy from this perspective where we are looking outwards preparing for danger and looking for danger. Often when people start therapy they react to their partner as a danger.

      Even though there may be things we need to express to our partner that bother us it is important to look inwards. Each of you will only become a  more effective partner if you can change your reactions and your patterns. When we focus on waiting for our partner to do something it creates a stalemate.

      Focusing on solutions

      In couples therapy, there can be an understandable tendency for partners to focus on what they want to be different and want that to happen before understanding what is behind their present strategies and reactions. This is not to say that working on ways you can do things differently is not useful. However, is more productive to change how you think and feel as this will begin to change how you respond. We tend to have a clear idea about what we need to do differently. The hard question is why don’t we do it?

      Avoiding emotional discomfort

      Maintaining emotional safety can cause your relationship to become dull and lack life. No one feels comfortable about facing their fears or taking the risk to speak from the heart when the stakes are high, but it is the time we learn the most.

      Being unprepared for sessions

      This is typically in the form of not knowing what you want to work on and being unclear about your goals both individually and together. This can lead to talking about what is most on someone’s mind or going over the last fight you had. Both of these are unproductive. At the beginning of counselling we spend some time identifying your goals. It is useful before each session to reflect on these objectives and the next step.

      So In Couples Counselling We

      Develop a clear picture of each person's contribution to the difficulty

      We hear from both of you about the difficulties you are having and assess the interactions and patterns that you have created with one another.  This is the first task of relationship counselling so we can together develop an understanding of the way forward.

      Learn about the negative cycles and ways out of them

      There are typical ways that all couples end up managing the disappointments and differences they encounter with one another. These develop into predictable patterns that you get stuck in.  Once we learn the dance you are having, we can work on changing how you respond.
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      Learn new skills in communicating

      A large part of the difficulties in relationships is communication.   Being able to get your message across, hear each other, negotiate your differences, and successfully repair breaches that occur.  A common difficulty in communication is reactivity that get in the way of expressing ourselves.

      The first place to start is awareness of our own unique system of reactivity. In therapy we exploring and learn to manage these responses.  This can lead to cycles of blame and defence or avoidance.  We do not automatically come with a communication manual when we enter relationships, and these bad habits are easy to develop.

      You will learn skills of repair and boundaries that support connection.

      Work through family of origin legacy

      Our family of origin is where we learn about boundaries and self-esteem. Two important aspects of our sense of self and connection.

      Trauma and attachment difficulties are brought into our adult relationships and need attention to improve our ability to be relational.