The Shame Cycle Explained

2HatsTestersTherapy process, Trauma

Even the mention of shame brings up a desire to avoid even talking about it.  It is the worst feeling and experience. It can be experienced as a constant dull ache lurking to erupt if we give it any attention, to a sudden flash of heat and intense feeling of needing to disappear.  Shame is a relational experience. In other … Read More

Unveiling the Dance of Perfectionism, Anxiety, and Projection

Alisa Chirpicinic RCCTrauma, Relationships

In the course of our lives, we all use defenses—strategies safeguarding us from the pain of challenging emotions or memories. One common defense, known as “projection” or “projective identification,” involves attributing threatening feelings to others and identifying with those emotions. However, this defense can lead to frustration as we lack control over others’ feelings. This dynamic is exemplified in the … Read More

Why we feel unsafe when there is no immediate danger

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTrauma


You might ask yourself why am I feeling unsafe and anxious when I everything around me tells me I am ok?  Why do some people breeze through life with confidence and calm, and others are consumed by thoughts of danger and betrayal?  We know our health, and the quality of our lives, are affected by the degree to which we … Read More

Do you struggle with wanting to feel normal?

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTrauma

feeling normal

Struggles to Feel Normal. I am not sure I have ever said ‘I want to feel normal.’  I think I have been one of those people at the other end of the spectrum who has made a point of being different and expressed my independence at every opportunity.  Being unique and authentic has been a lifelong task.  For me, it … Read More

Dare to Be You !

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTrauma

self acceptance,

The Road To Self Acceptance Is your self acceptance affected by trying to do the right thing, not making waves, and being careful not to upset people?  Do you find that living this way leaves you feeling disconnected, and you don’t feel real?  You are not alone. Self-acceptance can be a double-edged sword. You want to keep working on yourself, … Read More

Thoughts on unhappiness and depression.

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTrauma

depression, anxiety,

The causes of depression are complicated and is a part of the human experience for most people at some point. These thoughts are attempting to look at it in the broader context.

Connecting with your emotions

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTrauma

woman holding head in hands looking anxious, anxiety counselling vancouver

The Importance of Emotional Connection Do you feel uncomfortable around emotions, yours and other people’s? Do your emotions feel irrational, painful, or too vulnerable?  To suggest connecting to your emotions may be the last thing you want to do.  When I encourage people to focus on their emotions I typically hear two responses. If I feel emotions I won’t stop … Read More

The calming influence of mindfulness

Delyse Ledgard, RCCTherapy process, Trauma

Woman standing on one leg balanced with the light behind her. mindfulness.

Mindfulness can heal Mindfulness at its core is nothing new.  Bringing attention to our experience is fundamentally what mindfulness refers to. What is interesting is that the research confirms the benefits and provides us with information to inform our practice.  One of the benefits is how we can practice mindfulness to calm emotional reactivity. Lose your mind and come to your … Read More